The Moon Sídhe

I've been sitting here trying to think what to write. Nothing much ever happens to me, with the exception of my little seven year old sister, Lillian, chucking fits and being generally abusive toward me. Nothing nearly as interesting as this has happened in some time.

Probably because I don't do rituals, not proper ones, anymore. It's not due to lack of wanting too, more due to a lack or privacy and space. If I do things alone, I like to know I'm not being watched, that I'm really alone, and I just can't guarantee that. I could do it in my room, but theres not enough space, and I prefer to be outside if I can. If I do it outside, I always feel I'm being watched, and not in the nice comforting way that I should, and have, felt in circle. There are a lot of older folks and Christians in this neighbourhood that wouldn't appreciate having a pagan - if they even know what that is - in their mists, and I know it, and I hate it.

What I would really like is to be able to be part of a group, it's not too likely to happen in the near future, but I would like it. I feel better when I don't have to do things alone. it's.. like I draw from groups, or something. I don't know. I need a solution, and I need to work it out before the 8th, because then it's Beltane.